The other day I woke up feeling ugly.

You know the days. Those days where you question whether you really look like that and wonder how you still have friends and why they didn't let you in on the secret they've all been holding.

Everything about my face felt wrong and my hair had seemingly conspired with my pores over night to declare mutiny over my self esteem. I didn't shower, partly out of laziness and partly out of spite...which you know, likely really helped in this matter, and my little scowled face and I drove the whole way to work comparing my ugly to everyone else's pretty. 

Halfway through the day I posted this photo of myself to Instagram. The photo was one I took that morning in an attempt to convince myself I didn't look that bad in natural light. My post was strategically cropped, heavily filtered and given a cute witty caption.

Because you see. In order for me to feel okay with my reality that day, I felt like I needed to crop out what I didn't like and dress up what was left. 

How often do we do this? How often do we share only smidgens of the truth because we think it looks better in "Valencia" or sounds more inspiring outlined by a rectangle?

See that white background? Yeah. He took that photo in his creepy basement using a desk light and a piece of computer paper. Those perfectly clear blue waves crashing along the shoreline and against the toes of a that canoodling couple? Yeah. They just had a huge fight about how much their vacation cost.

What we see is not always what is real. It is not always the true, full, all-things-considered story.

More often than not, we aren't even comparing ourselves to the truth.

Because the truth of the matter is that truth is only found in Him...and not in the cropped (or full) versions of others' stories.

We were not created to sit around and compare ourselves; we were created to live in the freedom of knowing who we are as loved, chosen and accepted despite all our flaws and mishaps along the way.

Who are you comparing yourself to? What are you trying to crop, cut, hide or doll up in your life?



Bring those things into the light. Let others see. Share what is real. Accept your whole story for it is what has made you, you.

We all have pain. We all suffer. None of us are perfect.

But that's the thing. We were designed to need one another. Despite our imperfections we were created to spur one another on through our weaknesses and our strengths. Our world needs your good, bad and yes, even your ugly. Let yourself be you. You're the only YOU that ever was and ever will be.


But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor.  Galatians 6:4

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Philippians 2:3

Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Psalm 62:5
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. John 14:6


  1. loving this blog steph!!! love your honesty. You are talking about things that so many of us can relate to.
    looking forward to more!!

  2. So true! I know I fall into this trap as well...even while being aware of its' existence. Thanks, Steph, for your honesty and wisdom!

  3. Steph! Another great one! You have this way of connecting with your readers through your raw honestly.

    I find myself constantly comparing myself to the life of my best friend. Simply because she has a bf and will be engaged soon. Stupid, I know, but the truth. In reality her life is no better than mine. we all have struggled. The grass may be greener on the other side but just as hard to mow.

    By comparing ourselves we loose sight of our purpose that only we can fulfill. God created us. We are fearfully and wonderfully made and God chose us before creation. The body of Chrisy is made up of many parts just like a body - hand, foot, knee, ear. Each has it's special role that only it can fulfill and no part can survive on it's own (Ephesians). We are valued and important to the body of Christ.

    It is a pleasure to see you grow over the course of this year! Keep strong! God bless, Ella

    1. OMG I love this: "the grass may be greener on the other side but just as hard to mow."


      Such a pleasure to read your comments and know there's a kindred spirit sister out there somewhere in the world. Love, Steph